“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (New International Version)
Cooperation is not just a utility for social well being but a vital mechanism for the survival of the human race. We are structurally and physically dependent on one another. It is not an accident at all that when we are born, we are entirely dependent on others for everything. The first few years of our lives are a study in dependency. We are completely unable to do anything for ourselves. This dependency repeats itself in old age. The older we get, we also begin to lean and depend on others. That should tell us something fundamental about human nature.
Frailty defines early years and frailty defines our old age. We are often deluded by the vigour of adolescence, vitality of youth, and strength of middle age. At the height of our powers and strength, we are tempted to act as though we are invincible and unconquerable. I will never forget the last and dying days of my father. He was a strong and fiery man. Even though I was his only son, I never felt comfortable with him in a room together. He seemed too harsh, too hard and too tough. His voice boomed through the house. As a young man, I stammered. It was so bad it took me several minutes to finish a short sentence. The fear of my father made it worse. When he called my name, Segun, it was like I was summoned for life sentencing.
That you don’t need any help from anyone now does not mean you won’t need help tomorrow. Today may be yours; tomorrow may be for others’.
I can’t remember ever hugging him. Those were considered weakness and feminine in those days. If for whatever reason, he placed his hands on my shoulder, I would freeze in fright. But in his old age, he wanted to be held and touched but it was too late. Once, I remember him asking me why I was so scared of him. He wanted to know if he carried fire on his head to which I responded – yes. A few weeks before he died, I was helping him into his car on his way to the hospital. When he was seated, he looked me in the face and said, ‘it is me being carried, I can’t believe it.’
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He wasn’t a bad man. That was how he was trained. Men were supposed to be strong, hard and tough. The lesson in our text is that no one is so strong that he won’t need the love, support and encouragement of others.
‘Two people are better than one.’
Always! Just because you’re so strong, blessed and sufficient now should not blind you to the fact that you will not always be strong. That you don’t need any help from anyone now does not mean you won’t need help tomorrow. Today may be yours; tomorrow may be for others’. In your strength, remember your weakness.
Circumstances of life often require the support, love and help of others. And if you’re going to expect the support, love and help of others, you have to be willing to give it to others.
*Dr. Oshinaga (+2348030773584, +2348022073050, [email protected])
