By BAMIDELE JOHNSON
Miracle no dey tire government. In case, just in case, you are in doubt, the conversion of KI from an aircraft-blocking, fluid-splashing passenger into an “ambassador for airport security” should simultaneously convince and confuse you. It is not clemency, but the state’s thumbs up (Kundus, if you like) to egregious celebrity misbehaviour, complete with a press release and ministerial applause.
K1 did not just merely “offend sensibilities.” He violated aviation safety rules, assaulted crew members, obstructed a plane’s movement and delayed its operation, all of which, in sane countries, should have got him handcuffed, prosecuted and possibly banned from flying indefinitely.
The FG initially appeared ready to take a tough stance, with a proposed six-month flying ban that was later stated to be ’till further notice’, along with communication to the AGF and IGP to facilitate his prosecution. All of this has ended in a one-month flying ban and a new job title. Foreplay without consummation.
READ ALSO: FOR THE RECORD: FG’s statement on KWAM 1, Emmanson
The message? If you are famous enough, you can weaponise “remorse” like an access card to the VIP lounge of impunity. The musician’s apology, as I stated in a previous post, does not suggest that he is sorry.
The case of Comfort Emmanson, whose fun bag spill provoked mirth and revulsion in equal measure, seals the irony. She languished in prison for slapping a flight attendant and refusing to turn off her phone. She got her reprieve only after the nation had had its fill of spectacle. In contrast, KWAM 1’s punishment was negotiated down before the ink on the investigation dried.
Keyamo, the Aviation Minister, said this is “drawing a line.” It certainly is, but the line is drawn in disappearing ink on tissue paper and during a rainstorm. What we have here is not a lesson in law enforcement but a masterclass in the doctrine of selective justice, which makes rules rigid for the powerless and limitlessly elastic for the powerful, rich and famous.
At this rate, the next disruptive celebrity might not only avoid jail but also get a government contract to lecture pilots on cockpit etiquette. A Yahoo boy will someday be EFCC brand ambassador.
